Santa’s Slay (2005)
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He’s making a list… pray you’re not on it. Character: Mary ‘Mac’ MackenzieDirector: David Steiman Writer: David Steiman Cast: Bill Goldberg, Douglas Smith, Robert Culp, Saul Rubinek Genre: Comedy, Fantasy, Horror MPAA: Rated R for violence, language and some sexuality/nudity Runtime: 78 min Filming Locations: Alberta, Canada Distributors: Media 8 Entertainment, Lion’s Gate |
| Synopsis |
| On Christmas Eve of 2005, the Mason family is enjoying Christmas dinner when Santa Claus (Bill Goldberg) comes down the chimney and kills them all, including their dog. This opening scene is notable in that it includes cameos from several famous actors, including James Caan, Fran Drescher, Chris Kattan, and Rebecca Gayheart. Riding on his sleigh driven by his “hell-deer”, Santa arrives at Hell Township and proceeds to kill the locals in various holiday-themed ways. In one of his slaughters, Santa kills the occupants of a local strip club frequented by Pastor Timmons (Dave Thomas), a crooked minister who manages to survive the massacre. Later, Santa murders the local Jewish deli owner Mr. Green (Saul Rubinek) using his own menorah. Meanwhile, teenager Nicholas Yuleson (Douglas Smith) is living with his crazy grandfather (Robert Culp), a crackpot inventor who has created a bunker in their basement to survive Christmas. When Nicholas asks Grandpa why he hates Christmas, he is shown “The Book Of Claus”, which reveals the origins of Santa Claus. Apparently, Santa was the result of a virgin birth produced by Satan (just as Jesus was the result of a virgin birth produced by God). Christmas was “The Day of Slaying” for Santa until, in 1005 AD, an angel defeated Santa in a curling match and sentenced Santa to deliver presents on Christmas for 1000 years. This means that Santa is free to kill again in 2005. Upon arriving at the scene of Mr. Green’s murder, Nicholas is taken to the police station for questioning. He is bailed out by his girlfriend Mary “Mac” Mackenzie (Emilie de Ravin), just before Santa arrives and kills all of the officers. Santa pursues them in a police car, but they are able to escape (thanks to a shotgun, left in Mac’s truck by her gun-crazed father). They flee to Mr. Yuleson’s bunker, with Santa still in pursuit. Nicholas and Mac manage to escape, care of Grandpa’s snowmobile, but Grandpa is run over by Santa’s “hell-deer” and killed. The two teens hide from Santa in a local high school, hoping that Santa’s powers will end when Christmas ends, but are eventually forced to confront him in the gymnasium. They are almost killed by Santa on a Zamboni but are saved by Grandpa, who is actually the angel that originally defeated Santa. With Christmas ended and his powers gone, Santa flees in his sleigh but his “hell-deer” are shot down by Mac’s father with a bazooka. Pastor Timmons is found dead in a Santa suit and is presumed to be the killer, while in fact the real Santa Claus is boarding a flight to the North Pole. After the credits, Santa is at a house and looks into the camera and says “Who’s Next?” |
| Trivia |
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· Although this is a Christmas movie, it stars a large number of well-known Jewish actors, including Bill Goldberg, Saul Rubinek, James Caan, Fran Drescher, and Chris Kattan. In the opening credits, this movie plays on the fact that "Santa" is an anagram of "Satan". · As Bill Goldberg was a professional wrestler until 2004, there are numerous references to his wrestling career within this movie. Before Santa kills Mr. Green, he delivers Goldberg’s signature move, The Spear. When Santa kills the carolers, one of them is given a gorilla press drop. When Santa is walking through the Yuleson’s home, Goldberg’s entrance music can be heard in the background. And, after the credits, Santa delivers Goldberg’s signature line: "Who’s next?" · While killing his victims, Santa uses many familiar Christmas images. For example, he burns down the strip club with a flaming coal, stabs a man with a candy cane, uses exploding presents, drowns a woman in egg nog, chokes a man on a turkey leg, and kills a man with a wreath. He also plays on common Christmas phrases. For example, he spreads "yuletide fear" (instead of "yuletide cheer") and states "Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus". · The name "Nicholas Yuleson" is obviously a play on Yule, which is another name for Christmas, as well as Saint Nicholas, which is another name for Santa Claus. · In the school library, Santa throws the Charles Dickens novel A Christmas Carol at Nicholas. · When referencing Christmas presents, Nicholas mentions Optimus Prime (from the cartoon Transformers) and Castle Greyskull (from He-Man). · When Nicholas logs onto his computer, he does a search for Santa on Hooyaa (referring to Yahoo) and finds a Santa Tracker on G.O.N.A.D. (referring to N.O.R.A.D.’s Santa Tracker). · Tommy "Tiny" Lister makes a brief cameo in this movie as a gas station attendant, playing a character reminiscent of the Deebo character he made famous in the Friday movies. · The origin of Santa Claus is told in stop motion style, reminiscent of the Rankin/Bass television Christmas specials. |
| Film Quotes |
| Nicholas Yuleson: The clock just struck midnight at the pole. Christmas is officially over for you, Santa! Santa Claus: You know, most people make the same mistake. The correct time at the pole is completely discretionary, because the poles are where all the time zones actually converge. Mary “Mac” Mackenzie: He’s scary, yet educational. Mary “Mac” Mackenzie: You hit like a girl. |
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